The Anti-Sociopathic Image and Common Questions I Ask: Part 2

In the last post, I opened up about being classified as a sociopath and revealing the fact that not all sociopaths are bad people. Sociopaths are classified as such because the way they think, the emotions they feel, and how they process things. However, the only press they seem to get is bad press because only bad sociopaths are out there getting the attention. Good sociopaths are usually low-key. I'm sure it started for other reasons, but now it's due to the fact that people will start to stereotype them as evil. In fact, today I was researching groups on Facebook and other sites, looking for groups of highly functioning sociopaths (HFS) like me to discuss things with. I found none, as I expected would happen, but what I did find was... Well, see for yourself.

Sociopaths were mocked and hated, being pegged as no more than vile, emotionless people who exist only to hurt and manipulate everyone. This made me realize that if we're to clear out the misconceptions and introduce the world to another side of sociopaths, there is a lot of work to be done.

How An HFS Can Be Good?

After looking around (quite a bit; there are so many negative things out there), I've found that most agree a good sociopath is that way because of a moral code of their own devising.

"We all use short cuts to make decisions. It would be impossible for us to make a fully informed, reasoned decision every time such a decision was necessary. Empaths use emotional shortcuts, sociopaths don't/can't, so we come up with some other shortcut. A lot of sociopaths use shortcuts like "anything goes," or "I am only in it for me," but I have also met/talked to many sociopaths who have a more "principled" approach to life. I have met sociopaths who are utilitarian, a la Jeremy Bentham, or even Rawlsian. Some of my readers use religious codes to guide their actions. I use the shortcut of economic efficiency, gap-filled by Judeo-Christian ethics, which for me acts like a mental/emotional exercise regime -- monotonous drudgery, but ultimately good for mental/emotional health. The one thing that sociopath "codes" tend to have in common is that they don't fully map with prevailing social norms." Sociopath World

I have a moral code of my own. It's a mixture of the religious ethics I was raised on, some Eastern philosophy I adopted (as best I could), and what I was taught by one of my favorite bands, The Crüxshadows.

The band formed in '92, the same year I was born. I began listening to them at the age of 7 when an older brother of a friend went to see them perform in Atlanta. Later, I was excited to realize that they were (and still are) based out of the same city we lived in at the time. As I got older and life became more difficult (and that's a grave understatement), I turned to them for inspiration in deciding what was right and what was wrong. They became part of my moral code and to this day, still help me determine my actions.

Do not injustice to another
Defend the weak and innocent
Let truth and honor always guide you
Let courage find the light within

Stand up when no one else is willing
Act not in hatred or in spite
Be to this world as a perfect knight
Even if it means your life
- The Crüxshadows, "Sophia"

All of their lyrics are just as inspiring, and even the band is down-to-earth, caring, polite, and just genuinely good people. Through them, I have come to model myself into a person that people look up to, just as I look up to them. In combination with some of the religious ethics I was brought up with and some of those previously mentioned Eastern philosophies, I have become a person who is level-headed, realistic, practical, and as noble as I can be (in terms of defending others and standing my ground). It's rather difficult to stand up for others because I'm not really bothered by too much, unless it happens to me.

But is this who I really am? Or is it just who I want to be? Since this whole situation began, I've realized a lot of things I've fooled myself (and others, unknowingly) about. I always adjust myself to be what each person needs. What if I'm doing that to myself, changing the way I act in accordance with who I want to become and how I want to see myself? But that's another matter entirely - one I'm still exploring. So, we'll save that for later.

Right or Wrong? A Personal Look.
All through my life at different stages, I've asked myself how I feel about right and wrong. How would I act in certain situations? Recently, while taking another look at myself and trying to learn about myself in relation to the world, I've realized something: right and wrong doesn't matter.

I know what the social norm is. I know what you think is right and wrong. I know what I think is right and wrong. But it will not affect my decision in the end (in a majority of situations).

For example, the social norm says that stealing is wrong. The religion I was brought up in says stealing is wrong. You are the internet, so I cannot speak for you. In most cases, I would agree that my moral guidelines would say that stealing is wrong. So I wouldn't steal. But what about that starving woman? The one who gave everything for her three children, whose husband drank away all their life savings and left them for dead to be with another woman. What if there are no food banks, she can't wait that long to be approved for government assistance, and she has applied everywhere she can reach but is not hired. She steals to feed her children. If she is caught, she would be arrested. Her kids would probably go through the system and she would be shamed. But why? In this case, I believe survival is the most important thing. Who cares what is right or wrong? It's subjective.

Even in many other situations that don't seem so ambiguous. My decisions are not based on right or wrong. My moral code does have sway, but ultimately, I will do what is right for me. As long as (in compliance with my moral code) it doesn't harm anyone and it helps me, I really don't see too much problem. Of course, every situation is different and many other factors will come into play. But you can see what I'm getting at, can't you? What society (and everything else) says is right or wrong doesn't matter too much in the end. What matters is the intent, the reason behind it, the effect, and the outcome - both desired and actual.

Conclusion...
Life is made up of gray areas and unpredictable variables. Decisions shouldn't be based on a black-and-white, one extreme or another system of right or wrong. What we should be factoring into our decisions is what we intend to do, why, who or what it will affect, what we hope to get out of it, and what we will get out of it. Then we should weigh the pros and cons against our moral guidelines and religion (if we have any) and make a decision from there. 

So stop and ask: What am I doing? Why am I doing this? What negative impact(s) will it have? What am I hoping to accomplish? What are the possible outcomes? Do my morals agree with this? What will happen if I don't do this? Now... what will I do?